Gross Pregnancy Questions Answered!

[caption id="attachment_210" align="alignleft" width="300"]Gross Pregnancy Questions Answered Photo credit: bettina n / Foter / CC BY-NC-SA[/caption]

When you see the little "pregnant" sign on the digital display of your pregnancy test, all you can think is, "I'm going to be a mommy!"  That lasts about 4 seconds before all of the questions pop in.  How am I going to afford childcare? What is this going to do to my body?  What am I going to wear for 9 months?  The biggest question you will have is, "Is this normal?"  All first time moms have weird pregnancy questions, and some are embarrassing.

I have compiled a list of questions friends, family, and the internet has provided me that might be a little embarrassing to ask.  And, I am going to give you the embarrassing answers.  Every mother goes through it.  You are not alone.  I promise.

Question:  Is it normal to be really gassy?

Answer:  Um....yes.  It gets worse the further along you are.  Your intestines are more sluggish when you're pregnant, and the more pregnant you get, the harder the baby pushes into the intestines.  Sorry.

Question:  Is it normal to have more discharge than usual?

Answer:  Um...once again, yes.  And, once again, it gets worse the further along you are.  Third trimester you see the most because the mucus plug comes out.  And, sometimes it comes out over time, instead of all at once.  Use a panty liner.

Question:  Were you really thirsty?

Answer:  Yes, and that is probably a good thing.  Lots of water is good for you, your baby, and your skin.  Keeping your skin hydrated helps reduce the odds of stretch marks.

Question:  Did you leak when you laughed/sneezed/coughed?

Answer:  Yes.  Woot, woot.  There's a lot more pressure on your bladder and it can cause you to pee when you didn't mean to.

Question:  I sweat more!  Why?

Answer:  When you're pregnant, you're body is working in overdrive.  Therefore, you sweat more.  If you don't want to use an antiperspirant while you're pregnant, be liberal with the baby powder you get at the baby shower.  It'll help absorb the sweat.  The lavender scent should cover up any odor as well.

Question:  I am drooling.  Are you effin' kidding me?  Why!?!?

Answer:  Pregnant women produce more saliva.  A lot more.  Suck it up, buttercup.  Welcome to motherhood.  All glam.

What I listened to while writing:

Shake by The Head & the Heart

Emily by The Mowgli's

Home by Edward Sharp and the Magnetic Zeros

Sarah Smirks, documenting baby's accomplishments


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